That Thing

So I think I know a cause of all the emotional crap. I'm not special like I use to be. Everyone moved on and I was replaced. Perhaps it's that I was never put in a place that I thought I would be. Let me explain in points:
1. Marcos took over groups and the love from Mick. It also stopped me from making relationships with the people who visit. This SUCKS.
2. I thought I'd get to spend a little more time with Lee and Ruthie. I do get to...but it doesn't seem that they really seek it out. Sucks.
3. I was told that I would be able to make friends with Marcos and Saul to have some good guy friends. Saul is too busy planning a wedding/church planting. Marcos doesn't really care to have a friendship with me. Sucks.
4. I thought Megan and I would become great friends. Though she is my best friend here in Mexico, it's not like the good friendships I'm use to in the States. She doesn't really seek out a ton of time to spend with me. Sucks.
5. Rarely do I get personal invitations to things with other staff members that are Mexican. I would like a closer relationship there.

I dunno...essentially I've been hurt by lack of love. Despite the fact that I know it's about me loving others and not receiving it back, I still hurt without it. I'm praying that God helps me.